The Uncircumcised Tuber

Al Kessler telephoned this morning to talk about three things:

1.) The fact that he has nothing to do since returning home from his prison stint;

2.) The readable reliability of http://prairiehomeworld.blogger.com ;

3.) The excellence of this picture, which he beamed along on his brain-thoughts, and which seems to depict a[nother] sexy carrot, but this one in giant form:

GMOs Who F*ck Hard

These pictures are real. They were taken this morning.

Silent Furnace, Silent Garden

Mr. Anus Kacper emailed me last night to say the following:

I'm sorry to say that starting Monday evening,
in about 48 hours, we'll be closing the doors
to "Silent Furnace" for new members, here's why:
Since I released the "Silent Furnace", we've
been overwhelmed with members and inquiries,
this has caused quite a bit of commotion for
both Josh and I, and we've decided to close
of the exclusive membership for a while until
we can serve everyone.

Now, Anus's "Silent Furnace" site has not yet gone live, so it's
indeed odd that it's already closed. Anus adds:

[I]f you'd still like to sign up, there's still
time until Monday,  go right here:
[website removed]
If you're still not sure what Silent Furnace
is, and what you get inside... then allow me
to explain:
What is Silent Furnace?
If you've followed my work for a while, perhaps
you've seen me write a lot about sustainability,
bio-domes, water filtration, and surviving the
economic crash that's unfolding world-wide.
These are all my passions, as we live in very
interesting times, and I think you'd have to be
either very foolish or very uninformed(or perhaps
have a death wish) to not see the writing on the
wall, and take some measures to prepare yourself
and your family for some of these changes.
However...  I've really lately gotten bored with
these things a little.  Because basically anyone
with a brain is talking about this these days...
However, few are talking about what really matters:
Preparing and "evolving" your consciousness, and
becoming aware of what is really going on beyond
the veil of our limited perception.

I already want to send this asshole some money.
More "blah" follows:

There's a much bigger change happening on the planet
right now, and it has nothing to do with chem-trails,
sustainability, the new world order or economic collapse...
It has to do with consciousness.  The giant fire underneath
the ass of humanity that is causing all this mess in the
first place.
You see, while I've been doing a lot of this "mainstream"
type stuff in public, I've also been living a very
private "life" that very few have been aware of, not even
my closest friends...
I've never come out with any of it in public, or talked
about it, until recently, when I stumbled onto a very
unique couch, and a very good friend, Joshua, who you've
perhaps heard in the Silent Furnace sessions.
Between the two of us, Josh and I share 3 experiences of
dying and leaving this 3rd dimension to the 4th, 1 alien
abduction, being involved with the free energy movement
and seeing how the "powers that be" really operate our
world, and 27 years of self inquiry and meditation...
... [a bunch of worthless bullshit removed]

And now the hook:

When Josh and I began to talk together, one day after
another, it became obvious that we needed to share our
experience with the world, and provide a space for others
who are just beginning this similar journey.
That's why we created the Silent Furnace:
So, here's what you get as an exclusive paid member
of the Silent Furnace:
*Access to all the LIVE Silent Furnace Webinar Sessions.
Every week you get to join us live as we go deep,
laugh, and cry through the nonsense, and see the world
through a drastically new perspective.
This is a very unique time where you get to unplug,
sit and  melt into the silence, where peace and all
wisdom resides.
Many members have said just this alone is worth
the price of the membership, as the experiences and
realizations you can experience during these session
(if you're open to them), are completely mind blowing
and life-changing.
* Constant and unlimited access to the "archives",
of all past sessions, newsletters, and downloadable
material.
* Exclusive Member Courses.
At the moment we have 3 audio/video courses coming out
which are for exclusive members only, this is where
we take you really deep down the rabbit hole:
Course #1: Heart Creation Super Nova "Basic and Advanced"
In this course, we take you on the journey to discovering
how reality is really manifested.  We destroy the
infamous "the Secret" model where thoughts create reality,
and show you what's really going on, and how to
effortlessly slide into the "flow state".

How can there be archives on a site that still doesn't exist?
Tell us more, Mr. Anus!

The flow state is the real deal that few people really
talk about, where life takes care of itself, problems
solve themselves, decisions somehow flow by themselves,
and you have a  type of intimate connection with life
that countless poets have tried to describe.
This will be our next week and only available to
members.
That's just the beginning.  The other 2 courses
coming should blow your mind away. I won't talk
about them here.
Like I said, we are closing the doors to new members
this Monday, to sign up, if you're interested, we'd
love to have you inside:
[website removed]

-[Anus] Kacper

2 more courses that should blow my mind away? Wow!
And then, of course, the postscript:

PS. The Silent Furnace is not a religion or a belief
system, we are not affiliated with anyone or any
organization, our aim is to help all people.
This is Buddha on a Harley Davidson, enlightenment
with a disco ball.  A meditation party in a purple
spaceship.
A celebration of discovering what is true.
Expect to laugh.
[website removed again]
Kacper/Postawski Companies
PO BOX 97086
Richmond, BC
V6X 8H3
CA

He had me at Buddha in a disco ball!

Update: Mark Weyerhauser

It's 7:00 PM in Middleworldia and Dr. Rein Pudding has not turned up, though her ex-husband Maynard said (via Communico-Rug), "Has anyone looked in Chile?"

Meanwhile, somebody thinks Mark Weyerhauser may be another alias for Al Kessler.